Sorry for the dearth of blog posts recently. I was on such a roll of posting stories during the start of the year! And then, sadly, I've reached the barren wasteland of the annual calendar. It's technically spring, but the city where I live is still taking hits of the snow- sleet one-two punch. The days are getting longer, but it's so cold that I hurry into my home after work and don't emerge until the next morning.
Upside: nothing particularly embarrassing has happened to me recently.
Downside: nothing particularly entertaining has happened to me recently.
Translation: When my life is going along swimmingly, I have nothing to blog about. I successfully made a crock pot recipe without stirring in any volcanic ingredients. I partied it up last month with Bachelorette & Co. without incident. The closest I got to anything mildly entertaining was when the student checking IDs at the bar wound up being a former student of mine. Or when a particularly bubbly member of our party decided to give my number to some guy who was hanging out at our table. On the walk back, when I asked for some more information (like, you know, his name) she replied, "... maybe Mike?"
Great. So now I have to dodge calls from unknown numbers in case it's Maybe Mike on the other end of the line.
The next day, the fog of the evening lifted and some other details emerged. My friend still wasn't sure about his name, but she definitely remembered some other details. Like how he was banned from that particular bar/shopping center a few years ago for littering. Well, that and the fact that he was caught in the men's room with a female companion. But he definitely didn't get arrested until he tossed a Mountain Dew bottle onto the sidewalk.
It's been a few weeks and Maybe Mike hasn't called. Which was relieving at first, but now feels mildly insulting. Um, really Maybe Mike? You're tossing this slice of fierceness aside? This is your Mountain Dew Incident of 2009 all over again ...
See? It was work just stretching that story THAT far. Luckily, most of my awkward interludes pop up with the tulips so there is hope on the horizon.
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Update.
Okay, I recently had the worst day of work in my career. And I mean, the worst day I've ever had AND the worst day I will ever have. Nothing particularly tragic. Just disgusting. We're talking, Threat Level Retching. It is so far over the line I don't think I can even write about it. (Yet...)
I take it back, Universe! I love it when my existence is one yawn-inducing expanse of beige! Don't pepper my path with any more insanely bizarre stories that require me to breathe out of my mouth and just hope that death takes me quickly.
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